And she bowed her head down as if to pray. Soon appeared her pencil and writing pad. The lead angrily swept across the page as tears rolled down her face as she thought of the past, those lost, and obstacles conquered. She scribbled relentlessly until her fingers ached, her hand fell limp and her burdens had been emptied onto the many pages now covered in lead stains. She writes again.....

November 4, 2011

Leap

On many occasions I have claimed to be ready for love

Ready to feel love and to be loved

By a man who loves me for me

From the top of my head

To the soles of my feet

Through my good days, my bad days, my sexy days and even my bitchy days

By a man who can look past all my faults and flaws

Look past my forever growing list of requests and my constant gall

The audacity of me to say whatever comes to mind

Although I do so with eloquence and poise most of the time

*

I recall saying that I’m ready for the days of infinite bliss

Those times where he will seal each day with a warm kiss

When his spirit will cause me to miss him even when he’s only in the other room

The days when we look forward to seeing and feeling how our love will bloom

From two naked seedlings with no roots, stems, leaves, petals or a story to tell

With each new day they will be nurtured and watered and the seedlings will swell

Into a beautiful flower with many petals and leaves each with a tale of its own

Accompanied by the intoxicating scent of real love to show how much we have grown

It causes us to get drunk and high off our love for us

The love where when we kiss, each of us feel through our bodies a quick rush

*

I have also said that I am outfitted for the stormy days

The days that don’t make me smile but leave me in a brief daze

Although we don’t wish for them, I’m armed to deal with them

I am prepared if necessary to walk the green mile with him

I have my faith that we will make it through

My hope that each event will bring us closer and make us stronger

The wisdom to know that true love cannot be broken

And the sight to see that what we have is indeed true love

*

I believe I possess the knowledge and maturity

And I know I’m ready to experience such an opportunity

To grow intimately with someone else

While getting to know them and learn more about myself

I don’t want to rush, good things time

I promise to be supportive, patient, and kind

But is this enough to prove that I am ready for love

I guess we’ll just have to wait and see

I’m standing on the edge preparing to leap.

Love please don’t let me fall.

I'm going all in.

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